Don’t Get Depress, Get ‘On Purpose’

Don’t Get Depress, Get ‘On Purpose’

 An individual’s ability to relate with their family, friends, work-mates and the broader community is affected by their mental health.   In each year, approximately one in every five Australians will experience a mental illness. (Mindframe) What does this look like at work and at home and at social occasions? Examples: Someone at work has a lot of negative things to say about people and tasks.  They may fall short of KPIs and targets and blame everyone and everything else but not ever take personal responsibility. Someone at home has numerous fallouts or dramas with other family members, friends or neighbours etc. Over or under eating.  Over drinking.  Bullying. Passivity.  Apathy.  Anxiety.  Angry. When people are not on purpose, they are not ‘in wellness’.  A human being tethered to tasks that are set by conditioning and are about’ have to’ or ‘survival’ or ‘going through the mouse wheel motions’ is a human being living off purpose.  This makes people behave in unproductive ways, avoid their truths, partake in distractions or easily notice and judge faults in others.  They don’t vibrate positively. Being ‘On Purpose’ is what we are born for. Click to tweet  We can create our purpose or we can be born with a strong knowing of what our purpose is.  Being ‘on purpose’ is where happiness, peace, contentment and relief all reside.  Being on purpose is where life makes sense and stress can be a positive thing and not such a negative thing. Stress It is important to recognise that nearly every individual can be stressed and depressed by certain events. Most people get over the stress or depression within days...
Relationship Bliss

Relationship Bliss

How do you contribute to Relationship Bliss? Are you showing up consciously connected or unconsciously detached? I’m a bit of a comedian and really love to keep life upbeat and enjoyable with positive energy.  Having said that, today I’m kicking of on a very serious note.  Please keep an open mind and be willing to try and stretch your understanding and concepts beyond what you may be used to. As an avid observer of people and behaviour, I notice subtleties that, in the buzz of daily life, are easily and often downplayed.  This downplaying of certain subtleties in our daily routines, has an eventual reality check point.  This downplaying of certain subtleties can act like a deadly gas, not visible to the eye, that slowly creeps into an environment unknowingly until, something or someone passes out.  I am campaigning against the silent gas that breezes on in and poisons an otherwise very good relationships.  To ward against it, you need to wake up a part of your consciousness, become consciously connected and make it a daily practice to maintain conscious connection.  This keeps the creeping poisonous gas out of your relationship.  So, how do you do this? Living in the same house, sharing the same bed, going on the same holidays, parenting the same children, making the same mortgage payments, does not constitute being ‘consciously connecting’.  If your bond, your connection, your friendship, your love, isn’t your priority, consciously, then, the noisy, distracting, business of life can VERY EASILY seduce you into making everything else a priority.  BECAUSE, hey, your partner is always there right. You’re just always there.  You...
Grief – A Black Arm Band

Grief – A Black Arm Band

how would a black arm band make a difference?   Have you ever experienced loss? Yes, is the answer.   At some level, every single person you see, hear, touch and interact with is processing some kind of loss in some way. For some it is trying to be buried deep but, most likely it is coming out sideways or turning into anxiety or illness.  Maybe it’s being stored in your ‘baggage’ compartment.  For others, they will be overtly showing signs with anger and negativity.  Others may be overcompensating and filing up every moment with business.   I am sharing this with you for a very specific reason which will make sense by the end of this blog.   You started to have the experience with loss from the day you were born.  You lost your comfy womb, you lose the comfort of the breast feeding, you lose your dummy, you lose your toys, you lose your childhood freedom to institutions (school), you lose friendships, you lose jobs and confidence, you lose identity, you lose a pet or a grand parent or a sibling or a parent. Some losses are minor and insignificant to you. Some losses are very significant and they change you, they affect you, they influence who you are and how you interact with life and people.   Have you ever experienced grief?   Have you ever lost someone close to you, someone that helped define you, someone that helped life make sense to you?  How do you cope with that loss?  How do you process the confusion associated and the sadness associated?  How do you...
Is Positivity a Real Thing?

Is Positivity a Real Thing?

Positivity is a Real Thing Positivity absolutely has it’s place However, whilst it is a very healthy vibration that brings with it energy and ideas and it feels good, positivity can be misleading. WHAT THE? What I mean is, we can be mistaken into thinking we have to be positive all of the time because, well we keep on hearing that we attract what we focus on. In one way that is accurate but let’s define positivity, for some reality. We have a great range of positive energies to experience such as optimism, happiness, peace, contentment, excitement, curiosity, pride, victorious, humbled, validated, satisfied, stimulated. But what happens with your energy when you are not experiencing any one of those positively vibrating energies, what are you feeling in-between times? This is where you need to be very mindful. Warning: getting a handle on this ‘con­scious way of being’ is about having a deeper more practiced handle on how you e­nerget­ically show up in your days. Click to tweet How connected to and in touch with are you to your ‘knowing energy’.  I was torn as to whether to call this the ‘knowing state’ or the ‘expecting state’.  After all, our individual reality, our life as we know it, is bought to us by what we expect. So, expecting the outcomes of your goals and your life’s story, is a part of knowing you are living true to your story and purpose, even if some of your goals haven’t shown up yet or they seem like a quantum leap for you. You just continue to ‘know’ and ‘expect’, you continue to feel it in...
The Seduction of Satisfaction

The Seduction of Satisfaction

The Seduction of Satisfaction   Ultimately, isn’t satisfaction what we are trying to achieve? Once I get married, once I get a promotion, once I have children, once we have holidays, once we get a home, once we… We are in a constant dance with our urges   We are really a collection of urges. We urge for breath, sleep, food, flavors, sounds, sex and many other experiences. So, let’s face it right now, satisfaction is not really possible if we are constantly urging. Satisfaction is a seductive notion in a way. So, I’m swinging in my ‘thinking’ chair, which is a hammock hanging from a big tree beside a little trickling pond in my suburban backyard. Feeling ZONKED because it is the 1.1.2015 and I got to bed at 2am. I perform in the electric 80s show.  Last night we gigged at the Brisbane Retro ball and it was a stifling, sweaty, hot, fun evening. So now, I’m letting the breeze shuffle me around, in my hammock style thinking chair and I am gazing into space really.   It’s quiet, the fish pond is trickling, I hear crickets (hoping it’s not just tinnitus after last nights sound levels) and it is blissfully peaceful. I need nothing. I slept until I was ready to rise, eaten very good food, coffee fix satisfied, hung out with my man and my sausage dog. As I stare into nothing in particular, just relaxing in the energy of nature, I feel this urge, this unrest, this need for something that I must have overlooked. Which reminds me of a time I was staying with a single girlfriend after my 7 year...
Empower Your Kids

Empower Your Kids

Empower your kids NOW Adults are just a bigger older version of the child!   As a coach I work a lot with people in business or in the corporate sector where communication and interaction with people and teams is vital to the success of the business and the individual and their relationships. People often don’t like to hear this, but, adults are really a grown up version of their child.  If you didn’t play nice in the sand pit, it is all but guaranteed, as a leader or as a team member, you’re going to bring these childhood sand pit behaviours into your workplace.  Especially when high stress situations occur.  They don’t work!  What may have gotten you what you wanted in the sand pit, no longer yields the same effective result in the workplace, as a leader or as a team member or in any adult relationship. To keep it simple, we are leaders or we are followers.  We need both. As children, it would be so helpful if we could be empowered to manage our sand pit behaviour with a view to how that will translate into adulthood. Click to tweet By manage I mean, have some understanding and some strategies for how to cope in a moment that otherwise may cause long term detrimental effects on the adult version.  An example of this is, I remember being a follower and very often times feeling great internal distress because I wanted to say “no”.  I didn’t understand the feelings I was experiencing meant that I was uncomfortable with the situation and I was too scared to...
3 Must Have Relationship Pillars

3 Must Have Relationship Pillars

One blog post is not going to be a cure all for any dilemma, however a few seeds well cultivated, it can be a great help. There seems to be some common themes occurring within the relationships I have been coaching. These have inspired me to share some strategies to help make what seems complex, a little more simple. For a relationship to prosper there needs to be 3 pillars underpinning the relationship, creating the foundation that you build upon.  If you are experiencing challenges in your relationship, you can identify from these three pillars, where the challenges are coming from and, what aspect of your relationship requires tweaking or major help:   3 relationship pillars Effective communication this is where people fall over the most – we must learn what language we speak in and what language our partner speaks in so that we interpret and translate the right messages.  People are complex processing machines and emotions often confuse the data or facts.  Values are different for different people and understand how to articulate what is important to you, how you have perceived something and where your limits and boundaries are will all impact your outcomes.  What says love to one person doesn’t necessarily translate to love for the next person.  We speak in different love languages and value languages.  Some of us have become accustomed to being defensive and blaming assuming everything else is to blame and others of us know how to accept responsibility for our actions and thoughts and words.  Fighting is the most unsuccessful form of communicating.  It is about caring only about being...
6 Steps to Modern Day Manifesting

6 Steps to Modern Day Manifesting

The way to MANIFEST what you want in your life, is to KNOW intimately what you WANT in your life and, to deeply LOVE what you want in your life.  Be excited by and emotionally moved by what you want and KNOW with unwavering certainty that, IT WILL COME TO BE! Click to tweet 6 steps to Modern Day Manifesting STEP 1.  Write out the story Write out the vision of the life outcome as you ideally would like it to be.  Know it as though you know it IS going to happen.  Really connect with exactly what you want.  What it looks like in detail.  What it smells like, sounds like and feels like.  Spend time imagining this in your minds eye, like a movie.  Be the director.  It’s your movie in your mind.  Big hairy audacious goals, short term and long term goals.  Even teeny tiny goals.  Goals can be what you want to experience, How you want to feel, where you want to go.  What you want to acquire etc.  At first you may struggle to fill in the details and the colour in all the spaces of the mind movies.  The important thing is to start where are, but START and keep at it. STEP 2.  Quieten the mind Release all of the energy and tension you are holding in your body and mind.  Find a moment alone.  Shut the office door if you have to.  Sit very comfortably or lay down and close your eyes.  Breath in and out, big deep breaths, slowly and with even rhythm.  In breath is breathing in new, regenerating creative...