HELP!  I’m Motivationally Challenged.

HELP! I’m Motivationally Challenged.

There are definitely many reasons that can attribute to why we feel like our motivation has left the building. Here are a few you may relate to and you or someone you care about may be tucking in to one or all of these. Lack of goals – leaves us feeling lost or bored or lacking purpose and can lead to mood disorders like anxiety and depression. It can lead to distracting behaviours like drugs, alcohol, comfort food and low productive activities, like too much t.v. watching or pokies or electronic distractions. It is a fundamental human need to feel like you are a part of something and that your daily thoughts and efforts fulfil a sense of your reason for being, your higher purpose. Not having a sense of your big why is a common cause for low motivation. SOLUTION: have goals Not achieving goals we have set – feeling deflated, disappointed, sad, defeated and possibly pessimistic because we didn’t achieve goal/s. Making it all mean something that leaves us feeling negative as opposed to reframing the situation in order to find the useful learnings and takeaways, making it mean something that reignites our motivation. Packing up the goal posts and walking off the field as opposed to having resilience and creative determination to maybe, change the goal posts and keep on keeping on. Of vital importance with our goals is to celebrate our victories constantly instead of only weighing in on the big hairy audacious goals. What have you achieved? What are all the daily victories. What is great about this? SOLUTION – heed the below warning. WARNING: if you...
Resolving Conflict

Resolving Conflict

It would be an ideal world if we could see conflict as, a need to try and understand one another better than our current level of understanding.  As opposed to, assuming you need to make the other person completely wrong. “Whenever you’re in conflict with someone, there is one factor that can make the difference between damaging your relationship and deepening it. That factor is attitude.” — William James To add to that, the question to ask yourself to check in with your own attitude is, how rigid or justified and negative do I feel?  That is an indication of where your attitude is at. If handled effect­ively, conflict can be an opportunity for learning, growth and positive change. Click to tweet In the workplace or in any relationship, conflict can be an opportunity to learn and stretch and grow as long as there is an open attitude of first seeking to understand before seeking to be understood. Note:  Just because you do give people the space to communicate their perspective does not mean you are agreeing with them, it means you are stopping and listening long enough to completely understand where they are coming from. In some instances people can experience a rise in emotions and in some cases, some folk are less adept at regulating emotions when their emotions start to fire up. This means the emotional response can over power the initial intent or the ability to ground, listen, empathise and consider other perspectives and other peoples thinking.   A few tips: Not all people are created the same.  Largely our ability to process and handle conflict comes from our family system.  It’s faulty to assume the...
Empower Your Kids

Empower Your Kids

Empower your kids NOW Adults are just a bigger older version of the child!   As a coach I work a lot with people in business or in the corporate sector where communication and interaction with people and teams is vital to the success of the business and the individual and their relationships. People often don’t like to hear this, but, adults are really a grown up version of their child.  If you didn’t play nice in the sand pit, it is all but guaranteed, as a leader or as a team member, you’re going to bring these childhood sand pit behaviours into your workplace.  Especially when high stress situations occur.  They don’t work!  What may have gotten you what you wanted in the sand pit, no longer yields the same effective result in the workplace, as a leader or as a team member or in any adult relationship. To keep it simple, we are leaders or we are followers.  We need both. As children, it would be so helpful if we could be empowered to manage our sand pit behaviour with a view to how that will translate into adulthood. Click to tweet By manage I mean, have some understanding and some strategies for how to cope in a moment that otherwise may cause long term detrimental effects on the adult version.  An example of this is, I remember being a follower and very often times feeling great internal distress because I wanted to say “no”.  I didn’t understand the feelings I was experiencing meant that I was uncomfortable with the situation and I was too scared to...